My wife and I just got back from our friends’ wedding and I had to post on here because while I was at the wedding, I was inspired. I am still a newlywed and not too long ago my wife and I went through the wedding planning process, all of the many questions: where are we going to get married? What type of food will we serve at our reception? What colors will we wear? And finally what parts of our ceremony/ reception are the most important to us? So many things to figure out, you would think you were the sole planner of an event like the super bowl.
As far as planning a wedding goes, I was coming at this from an interesting perspective because for the last 5 years I have been a server at a venue that does mostly weddings. In my time working there, I have seen some great ideas, and also some of the UGLIEST centerpieces, dresses, and color combinations that I’m pretty sure have ever been created. All this to say, because of my job, it was easier for me to decide what I thought was necessary to include in our wedding and what we could exclude. One of the things my wife and I decided we would not do on our big day, was give out wedding favors. You may say, well you guys must have not cared very much about the people coming to your wedding, how could you not give a wedding favor? Before you cast stones, hear me out. As a server that works at weddings, I see where most of those wedding favors end up. If they are some type of food treat, they are usually consumed, However, if they are not able to be consumed…
They mostly end up in the trash. (think: this is the opposite of being green) : (
Why do I point this out? There is a new trend among brides and grooms worldwide, Instead of buying wedding favors for their guests, they are donating the hundreds of dollars they would have spent on little trinkets to organizations that are helping people worldwide. A few weddings I have recently been to, have even used their big day as a creative platform to teach their guests about the organization they are donating to and the specific people group the organization is trying to help.
Wedding season is upon us. Each Saturday of the last two weeks, my wife and I have been at a wedding. This summer, whether you are planning your own wedding, a part of a wedding party, or a guest attending someone else’s, I hope you have a chance to think about ways you are able to use big celebrations in your life, to teach and inspire others, raise funds to donate, and thank God that he has blessed you so that you can bless others.
I want to hear your stories… Inspired? Ticked off? What are your ideas? What have been your experiences?
Hey Stephen! I agree with the concept, but also have some other thoughts. Obviously I am familiar with what you and Shawna had and passed on for your Day!
My favors were insisted upon, bought, and assembled by Nana and Memere (and you know better than to argue with them…).
But instead of cutting something that affects the guests, why not cut something that affects YOU more directly?
If you want to toss in the nonprofit thing for guests, add it to the favors – a note attached to a votive, a candy tin with the name of a nonprofit on it, etc. Some people may appreciate a simple gift donation, but you might actually educate more people by giving a gift – to them – that includes info on a justice cause.
If you want to donate to something in lieu of a wedding extravagance, what about giving up the limo, the $2,000 dress, or the champagne toast?
Just some thoughts – of course, with my wedding a year and half in the past, I come up with all these ideas! Shoot.
Thank you for your insights Trista. It is true what you said and I had even thought about adding a little bit at the end of my post about people taking an even more radical approach to using times of celebration to make a difference, but at the time I guess I thought it was a little too radical to suggest that someone give up their wedding dress, food, or honeymoon to benefit others. I am planning to feature some more stories in the future about people that have done these things, but for a first post, I decided that this would be a good first step.
In the same way that you have all of the ideas about what you could have changed/ gone without at your wedding, I am hoping that people will give thought to how they can use times of celebration to redirect their resources from themselves to others. I do like your idea about using the wedding favor as a teaching tool. I think there would need to be a great deal of thought as to how to best give something of quality that effectively communicates the message you are wishing to convey. People willing to do the research or dedicate the time to creating something like this, should definitely go for it.
Again thank you for your valuable insight and encouraging me and inspiring me to learn how to more effectively care for others. You and Tommy were one of the couple’s that inspired me to write this post.
PS – I was carrying ALL your weight in that photo.